"Trust" ((Inuyoko Mass #10))
Hello, everyone. My name is Inuyoko T’Alveni and I am a Cleric of this Shrine, and a member of its clergy since deoch 53. Thank you for coming to my Mass this sun. If this is your first time in this temple, welcome. We often talk here about the larger meaning of words that are associated with Deoch, such as rapture, creativity, inspiration. But this sun, there’s a word on my mind that is not often associated with Him directly, but I feel is worth exploring a bit. That word is ‘trust’.
I trust that you all will know what this word means. We could try to define it concretely, but I think there will always be small difficulties when it comes to the myriad applications. While the definition itself is fairly easy, the way it manifests in us and in the world is quite nebulous. If I were completely new to this world, would I trust someone who tells me that if I die, everything will be fine? Perhaps, but for many this is simply too much to believe until they witness it themselves. The person making the claim is perfectly worthy of trust. They have experience. They know how Sgrios safeguards our spark upon death. But to the person who is being asked to trust, there may be too many unknowns.
If you are familiar at all with the history books, you may recall that it was the pursuit of the knowledge of Kadath, and the hubris of the Aosdans to try to control and manipulate the elements and forces of nature, which brought their civilization to an end. This is what is said, anyways. And even after the first Aosdan civilizations, when the original Tuatha de Danaan came and joined with those who remained in the civilization of Hy-Brasyl, it was once again that desire to truly know the secrets of Kadath…for all we know the deepest secrets of the universe itself… and to bring them under the control of humankind that brought them to devastation once more.
Why do I bring this up? Well, take a look at the surface-level contrast between the first thing I spoke of and the second: On one hand, an Aisling who does not trust. Perfectly reasonably so, because they do not know…and on the other hand, a god who has multiple examples of why maybe we should not be trusted, but who did so anyway. Who gave humankind the spark which again compels us to understand all the secrets of the world, and gives us the power to do so. Hopefully in a more reasonable way this time. But it’s clear that there is something deeper here. Not all trust can be measured to be appropriate or misguided by experiences alone.
It is important for us to trust our experience *and* our instincts. We gain nothing by being trusting to the point of naivety. But we also lose so much more if we succumb to cynicism. We are here together right now because we have faith in our gods to guide us, aid us, and help us keep the balance of the world intact. We have faith in each other, in our communities. Therefore, we trust.
And with trust, there is hope.
There is the hope that we will use our gift to make our world a better place. Deoch trusts us to do exactly that. Likewise, when someone violates His or our trust in egregious ways, we should feel compelled to address them, because that too is a part of maintaining trust.
But what about trusting ourselves? With how we usually speak about trust and the ways it can be violated, how do we break our own trust? It feels almost oxymoronical. We can’t lack the experience which we have. We are ostensibly in control of our own actions and destinies. So where is there room to violate our own trust? To ask the question is to forget that we are more than just ourselves. It is to forget that how we exist in relation to others and nature itself is part of our whole. It is to forget that while we are always ourselves, we are also always new people, in every new moment. It feels natural to assume that as Deoch turned from Chadul to Danaan and witnessed the lengths she would go to to protect us and our world, he may have looked at his old self with shame. Surely Deoch must have trusted in Chadul in some manner? Whether he believed in a vision of darkness, or simply trusted that things would work out in his benefit within the world Chadul wished for, or some other motivation entirely, there had to be some kind of trust. And when he realized that there was more beauty in the vision of balance that Danaan held…more beauty in her passion for creation over destruction…surely he must have felt that who he was had let him down. If not, why else would he put so much care and effort into finishing that work, and making amends?
I don’t wish to go overlong here, so I will begin to wrap up. I don’t think I have an overarching conclusion, or the answers to the host of questions that have been asked. As always, my goal here is to think about our world, our god, and our principles, to pick them apart a bit. And hopefully, in the end, my words will bring you some sort of inspiration.
May the warmth of your spark instill faith and trust in others.
Mass is cast.
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